my favorite kirkus quote is still the one for The Adventures of Hotsy Totsy (I should also note, it's the favorite of everyone in my department as well):
"A publishing event that demands an apology to the industry, all children and the trees that gave their lives. "

Though this recent one is pretty good (for A Girl, A Ghost, and the Hollywood Hills):
"That novel, however, saddled with the author's determination to shoehorn in thinly drawn stand-ins for Polonius, Ophelia and Laertes, as well as Rosencrantz and Guildenstern and an iMovie version of the Claudius-poisons-King-Hamlet play (starring rowdy Australians), is a hot mess."